Heartbreak: Letting Go of What Wasn’t Meant for You
When a relationship ends, it can feel like you’ve lost a part of yourself.
You’re not just mourning the person — you’re grieving the life you thought you were building together. The future you imagined, the memories that could’ve been, the plans that never had a chance to unfold. It’s not just sadness. It’s disorientation. Loss. Sometimes even panic.
You thought they were the one.
And now… everything feels upside down.
“If They Were the One, You’d Still Be Together”
Relationship coach Matthew Hussey says something that cuts straight to the heart of heartbreak — and helps it begin to heal:
“If they were the right person for you, they would still be there.”
It sounds simple. But in those long, aching moments of missing someone, we can convince ourselves we lost our only chance at love. We replay what we had, romanticise what it could’ve become, and hold on tightly — not to the reality of the relationship, but to the version of it that lived in our hopes.
Believing someone was “the one” when they chose to walk away, when the relationship no longer made you feel safe, valued, or seen — that belief is what prolongs the pain. It makes the letting go feel impossible.
But the truth is, love shouldn’t require you to fight for your worth.
Heartbreak Isn’t Just in the Mind
It’s easy to feel like you should be okay by now. To brush off your pain or try to speed up the healing. But heartbreak isn’t something you simply “get over.” It’s something your whole system processes — emotionally, mentally, physically.
You might feel:
A constant ache in your chest
Sleepless nights or early waking
Brain fog or an inability to focus
That hollow feeling where joy used to sit
The push and pull of hope and hurt
There’s nothing wrong with you for feeling this way. Your nervous system is responding to deep emotional loss. This isn’t about weakness. This is about being human.
The Hidden Grief of “What Could Have Been”
One of the hardest parts of heartbreak is mourning a future that now won’t happen. You were investing in something. A shared vision. Maybe a home, a family, a sense of belonging.
When that disappears, it’s a real loss, even if others don’t see it that way.
But here’s a truth worth remembering:
Just because something felt right at one time doesn’t mean it was right for your life.
And just because it ended doesn’t mean you failed.
It means you learned something about what you need, what you deserve, and what you will no longer settle for.
How Solution Focused Hypnotherapy Can Support You
At Trancespire, I help people gently find their way forward after heartbreak, not by reliving the pain, but by creating space to reconnect with calm, hope and possibility.
Solution Focused Hypnotherapy is a powerful blend of positive psychotherapy and hypnosis that helps you move from survival mode back into a place of steadiness.
Through our sessions, you can:
Lower emotional overwhelm and stress
Sleep more soundly
Regain perspective and clarity
Quiet those looping thoughts
Rebuild your confidence and sense of self
It’s about supporting you to feel safe in your own mind and body again — without needing to rehash every painful moment. Together, we focus on what is still possible, one gentle step at a time.
A New Chapter, When You’re Ready
Heartbreak hurts — deeply. But it’s not where your story ends.
You may not see it yet, but there is still life to be lived. Still love to give and receive. Still joy to be felt in quiet, beautiful ways.
You didn’t lose your one chance at happiness. The right person for you will never need convincing. They will meet you where you are; with presence, care and clarity.
And until then, you can be your own soft place to land.
📍 Based in Llangorse, near Brecon, Hay-On-Wye, and Crickhowell, Wales — also available online UK-wide.
👉 Book a free consultation
👉 Or learn more about how Solution Focused Hypnotherapy can support emotional healing
