Social Anxiety: Easing the Weight of Being Seen
f you’ve ever felt your chest tighten before walking into a room, or your mind spiralled after a conversation, replaying every word and tone, wondering if you said too much, or if you’ve put off plans, ignored messages, or left emails unread because responding felt overwhelming, you are not alone.
That is social anxiety. Even if no one around you seems to struggle with it, many people do. It just doesn’t always show on the outside.
It’s Not Just in Your Head, It’s in Your Body Too
Social anxiety is not a weakness. It is not just overthinking. It is a deep, automatic stress response that has roots in our survival instincts.
In early human history, belonging to the group meant protection. Rejection could lead to isolation, which was dangerous. Our nervous systems learned to treat social threats seriously.
Now, the threats are work meetings, weddings, messages left unread, or awkward silences, but your body still reacts as if your safety is at stake.
Your heart races. Your face burns. You want to escape. You know there is no real danger, but your body presses the panic button anyway.
What Social Anxiety Feels Like
Worrying for hours or even days before a social event
Rehearsing what you will say, again and again
Overanalysing everything afterwards: “Did I sound strange?” “Were they judging me?”
Avoiding things you want to do because it feels too overwhelming
Feeling guilty or frustrated for not feeling more confident
It is not that you do not care. You care deeply, so deeply it becomes overwhelming.
The Stress Bucket
One way to understand social anxiety is by imagining a stress bucket. Every worry, pressure, or demand adds another drop. Social situations, especially high-stakes ones, can fill the bucket quickly.
And when it overflows, panic, shutdown, or exhaustion can happen. You are not broken. Your bucket is just full, and there are gentle ways to empty it again.
How Solution Focused Hypnotherapy Can Help
At Trancespire, I use Solution Focused Hypnotherapy to support people living with social anxiety. This gentle approach combines positive talking therapy with the calming benefits of hypnosis.
It is not about digging into past trauma or reliving painful memories. Instead, it focuses on what is going well, what is possible, and the small steps you can take to feel better.
Hypnosis does not mean being out of control. It is more like being deeply relaxed and focused, similar to when you are engrossed in a book or lost in thought. In this calm state, your mind becomes more open to helpful changes.
Hypnotherapy can help you:
Lower stress levels in your brain and body
Calm the fight or flight response so you feel safer in social situations
Mentally rehearse positive outcomes instead of worst-case scenarios
Build confidence and self-trust, one step at a time
It is a gentle, empowering process that is always led by you.
You Are Not Alone and You Are Not Failing
One of the hardest parts of social anxiety is how invisible it can be. Others might see you cancel plans or stay quiet, but they do not see the storm happening in your head beforehand.
You are not weak. You are not failing. You are doing your best with the signals your nervous system is sending. That is not just surviving. That is strength.
You deserve more than just getting through. You deserve to feel calm, confident, and free to be yourself.
Start Small. Be Kind to Yourself
You do not have to change everything at once. Start with small shifts:
Take a breath before you respond
Remind yourself, “It is okay to be a bit awkward sometimes”
Reach out without feeling you have to explain everything
There is nothing wrong with you. You are allowed to take your time. You are allowed to be seen just as you are.
If you are ready to try something different, hypnotherapy could be a gentle place to begin.
Ready to Begin?
Curious about how a session could help? Let’s have a chat. No pressure, just an open conversation about what is possible.
📍 Based in Llangorse, near Brecon, Hay-On-Wye, and Crickhowell, Wales. Online sessions available UK-wide.
👉 Book a free consultation
👉 Read more on how I can help with anxiety
