Social Anxiety: Easing the Weight of Being Seen
If you’ve ever felt your chest tighten before walking into a room...
If your mind has ever spiralled after a conversation, going over every word, tone and moment, wondering if you said too much...
If you’ve put off plans, ignored messages or left emails unread because even thinking about responding felt overwhelming...
You're not alone.
That’s social anxiety. And even if no one around you seems to struggle with it, many people do. It just doesn’t always show on the outside.
It’s Not Just in Your Head — It’s in Your Body Too
Social anxiety isn’t a weakness. It’s not just overthinking. It’s a deep, automatic stress response; something we’ve inherited from a time when belonging meant survival.
Back then, being accepted by the group meant protection. Rejection could lead to isolation, which was dangerous. So our nervous systems learned to treat social threats seriously.
Fast forward to now, it’s a work meeting, a wedding, a message left on read, an awkward silence in conversation... but your body still reacts like your safety is at stake.
Your heart races. Your face burns. You want to escape.
You know there’s no real danger — but your body presses the panic button anyway.
What Social Anxiety Feels Like
Worrying for hours (or even days) before a social event
Rehearsing what you'll say, again and again
Overanalysing everything afterwards: “Did I sound strange?” “Were they judging me?”
Avoiding things you actually want to do because it just feels too much
Feeling guilty or frustrated for not feeling more confident
It’s not that you don’t care. You care deeply — so deeply it becomes overwhelming.
The Stress Bucket
One way to understand this is by imagining a stress bucket.
Every worry, pressure or demand adds another drop. Social situations — especially those that feel high-stakes — can fill the bucket quickly.
And when it overflows? Panic. Shutdown. Exhaustion.
You’re not broken — your bucket is just full. And there are ways to gently empty it again.
How Solution Focused Hypnotherapy Can Help
At Trancespire, I use Solution Focused Hypnotherapy to support people living with social anxiety. It’s a gentle, modern approach that combines positive talking therapy with the calming benefits of hypnosis.
It’s not about digging into past trauma or reliving painful memories.
Instead, it focuses on what’s going well, what’s possible and what small steps you can take to feel better.
Hypnosis doesn’t mean being out of control — it’s more like being deeply relaxed and focused, like when you're engrossed in a book or lost in thought. In this calm state, your mind becomes more open to helpful changes.
It can help you:
Lower stress levels in your brain and body
Calm the fight or flight response so you feel safer in social situations
Mentally rehearse positive outcomes instead of worst-case scenarios
Build confidence and self-trust, one step at a time
It’s a gentle, empowering process, always led by you.
You’re Not Alone — and You’re Not Failing
One of the hardest things about social anxiety is how invisible it can be.
Others might see you cancelling plans or going quiet — but they don’t see the storm happening in your head beforehand.
You’re not weak. You’re not failing.
You’re doing your best with the signals your nervous system is sending. That’s not just surviving — that’s strength.
But you deserve more than just getting through.
You deserve to feel calm, confident and free to be yourself.
Start Small. Be Kind to Yourself.
You don’t have to change everything at once. Start with small shifts:
Take a breath before you respond
Remind yourself, “It’s all right to be a bit awkward sometimes”
Reach out without feeling you have to explain everything
There’s nothing wrong with you.
You’re allowed to take your time.
You’re allowed to be seen, just as you are.
If you're ready to try something different, trance could be a gentle place to begin.
Curious about how a session could help?
Let’s have a chat. No pressure — just an open conversation about what’s possible.
📍 Based in Llangorse, Brecon, Powys, Wales — also available online UK-wide.
👉 Book a free consultation
👉 Or read more on how I can help with anxiety
